


I'm Here For Tonight

by bananasarehellagay



Category: Cartoon Therapy (Web Series), Sanders Sides (Web Series), Thomas Sanders
Genre: Anxiety, But it ends well i swear, Fluff and Angst, Genderfluid Dr. Emile Picani, I have no shame, If this fic goes anywhere, M/M, Medication, Nonbinary Character, On Hiatus, Panic Attacks, Slow Burn, The Title Is Dodie, The boys are all useless, analogical - Freeform, ill update these as i go, maybe smut idk, no beta reader we d!e like men
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-20
Updated: 2020-11-03
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:20:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 8,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24279478
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bananasarehellagay/pseuds/bananasarehellagay
Summary: The sides and Thomas, drowning in anxiety, make a difficult decision. Anxiety medication. Instead of causing harm to the seven of them, maybe... just maybe... it could help.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Deceit Sanders, Dr. Emile Picani/Sleep | Remy Sanders
Comments: 60
Kudos: 161





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! This fic is going to be mostly fluff, with some light angst! There's some more notes at the end to check out!  
> Without further ado, let's begin!

“-So the logical conclusion would be to request medication from Thomas’s provider.”

“ **Wha** **t** **?** ”

Around the room were four faces in various levels of shock. Patton and Thomas looked… afraid.

“Logan is of course, _entirely incorrect_ when it comes to this matter,” Janus drawled from a chair he’d pulled to the darkest corner of the room. “When it comes to our wonderful host’s health, you’d be _ill advised_ to listen to logic.”

“But- but what would that do to the kidd- to Virgil?” Patton stammered, eyes wide. “What if it hurts him?” All eyes turned to Virgil, who huddled deeper into his hoodie. Obviously uncomfortable with the attention, the anxious facet tried to reassure the fatherly figment.

“And I thought worrying was my job.” He joked.

“Patton is right, Virgil.” Thomas said softly. “We don’t know what could happen!”

“No. Logan is the one you all should be listening to.” 

Logan and Deciet rolled their eyes with a soft “Finally” from the logical side. 

“I- I’ve been overbearing.” He turned to Thomas. “Thomas, you- none of us can function, and that’s my fault! I’m tired of hurting everyone.”

“Virgil-” Roman interjected.

“ **No!** No. Let’s try it.” Virgil squared his shoulders. “Logan, I’ll let you figure out all the logistics, I’m going to go take a nap.” 

***

With that horrid encounter out of the way, Virgil sank down into his room. Dark walls covered in posters greeted him, everything untidy in a way that spoke more to executive dysfunction rather than ‘lived in’. He flopped face down on to the bed. Millions of thoughts ran through his mind at the speed of light. _What if, What if, What if._ Most anxiety medications could have withdrawals, he knew that much, but Virgil trusted Logan to do the research. 

He flipped onto his back, fishing in his pockets for his phone before blasting some Poppy and IC3PEAK through his headphones. The loud and fast music gave him something to focus on other than his racing thoughts, and allowed his breathing to calm. As the anxious man drifted off to sleep, he was blissfully unaware of the other issues in the mindscape.

***

Logan had locked himself in his room almost immediately, researching pros and cons, reaching out to Emile Picani, the therapist figment Thomas had created for his “Cartoon Therapy” series. After hours of steady data collection, he was interrupted by a soft knocking. When he went to open the door, it revealed a nervous Patton, picking at the sleeves of his cardigan.   
  


“Patton. Come in.” The logical facet gestured inside. Sitting the man down on the reading chair next to his bookshelf, Logan took his own seat at the desk, wheeling his chair around to face the other. “What seems to be the cause of your troubles?” He asked.

“Well…” Patton looked down at his feet. “Are you really going to let Virgil go through with this? Roman and I are scared, we-” He glanced up, eyed bright with unshed tears. “What’s gonna happen to our kiddo?” 

_Ick. Feelings._ Logan cautiously moved to sit next to Patton, allowing the taller man to wrap his arms around Logan’s body for comfort. “I have researched the medications extensively, talking with Dr. Picani and seeing what first-hand accounts I can find.” He pushed up his glasses with his free arm. “Like any medication, it works to lessen the symptoms of anxiety and the frequency of panic attacks. Virgil will still be here, and he will still function as Thomas’s fight or flight.”

“I don’t really understand what you said, but it sounded really smart!” Patton pulled away, ruffling Logan’s hair. “Thank you LoLo!”

Logan frowned at the back of the fatherly facet as he left, concerned for the man. As always, Patton had Roman. They were good for each other. Logan felt a twinge of jealousy before returning to his work.


	2. A difficult day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess who's back on their bullshit? ME!  
> Thank you all for the feedback and the kudos!  
> As always, comments feed my ego and keep me writing, so feel free to leave whatever, if it's your favorite moment, a heart, or you screaming about the chapter!  
> Out of the frying pan...

When the morning came, everyone in the mindscape was greeted with a smokey void where Virgil’s room should be. Usually what this meant was the anxious side was having a particularly rough day, and just wanted to be alone, but combined with the creeping panic all sides were feeling, was highly concerning. Patton wanted to “help my dark strange son!” as he so put it, but the others convinced him to start breakfast instead. Patton and Virgil don’t mix on mornings like this. Roman is typically deemed too loud and dramatic for these situations as well. That left Logan and Janus. 

“I have  _ no clue _ what to do in situations like these.” Deceit reassured Logan. “I  _ didn’t _ live with Virgil for years, so we  _ obviously don’t _ have a plan for difficult days.”

Logan fiddled with his tie anxiously. He wanted to be the one Virgil could turn to, but the probability of that was miniscule. “If there is anything I- we can do to assist him, let us know.” The factual side murmured. 

Janus turned away from Logan, slinking off to Virgil’s room with a knowing smile.

The rest of the sides -barring Remus and his odd schedule- met in the kitchen. Patton busied himself by making pancakes and eggs, Roman starting up the coffee. Virgil was either the first or last one up in the mornings, and the room felt oddly empty without him. Princey was loudly reciting a scene from Heathers from memory to make up for the static silence.

Logan sat at the table and pulled out a book, staring blankly at the pages and mindlessly turning them, not reading at all.

***

Janus knocked lightly on the shadowy door. It swung open without a sound, the inside of the room completely obscured. He walked inside, going solely by memory to the chair in the corner. When Anxiety still lived with Deceit and the Duke in the dark side, Janus would sit in the chair and read young Virgil stories to help the boy fall asleep. Now, he uses that same chair to offer a different kind of support to Virgil. 

The shadows trickled away into the corners of the room. Virgil was sitting against the headboard of his bed, knees drawn up and head in his arms. Janus winced at the familiar position before taking off his hat and ruffling his hair, making more noise than usual, allowing the anxious side to adjust to his presence.

“Hey, Janus.” Virgil croaked from his position.

“Hello, Virge. What is my  _ dark strange son _ doing in sweatertown?” Janus queried. Virgil snorted and looked up from his arms.

“Oh I don’t know, maybe the existential dread and possible threat to my very existence in Thomas’s mind.” Janus winced, but Virgil barreled ahead. “I know, I know, Lo’s got everything figured out, because he’s smart, hot, and not a useless mess, but I can’t help but worry, It’s  **what I do-** ”

Virgil was hyperventilating. His eyes were wide and had his hands buried in his dark hair. Janus restrained himself from jumping to the aid of his friend, instead getting up slowly to sit on the bed facing Virgil, a good distance away.

“Hey, hey, none of that. Look at me.” Janus said quietly. When he locked eyes with Virgil, he continued. “Breathe in for four. Hold seven, out eight.” He counted through a few repetitions of the technique with his fingers, making sure Virgil’s chest was rising and falling with his hands. Only after he’d seen the other man calm did he continue. “Virgil, Logan would do nothing to put you in danger. Medications can have withdrawals, that much is true.” Janus’s snake-like eye shined in the semi-darkness. “However, you have five sides who would do anything to help you.” He slowly removed one of his gloves, holding up the naked hand. “On my honor.”

Virgil launched himself into Deciet’s arms, and they stayed like that for the rest of the day.


	3. my starshine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> motivation has been iffy, but school is out for me! summer time!  
> I plan to post once a week (at the minimum), but if plans change I'll let you guys know!  
> I love all the comments you guys! Even if it's just an extra lil heart for more kudos or you squealing about this week's chapter, I try to read them all and respond!

Getting dinner ready was a quiet affair. Patton was deep in thought, mechanically putting together a simple meal of grilled cheese and tomato-basil soup. Roman was softly humming to himself, draped over the lap of one stressed nerd, the latter reading  _ Alice in Wonderland _ . Logan had been working nonstop all day. It took seven minutes and fourteen seconds of whining from Princey for the logical side to take a break. There was creaking from the hallway.

*** 

Virgil and Janus made their way down the hall, murmuring to each other about nonsense on Tumblr and obscure spider trivia. The anxious side took a seat. Janus opted to sit next to Virge. There weren't specific spots at the table like there were in the living room for videos, instead the sides rotated around the table to sit next to different people at each meal. Chairs were summoned as needed, making it easy to find a seat when someone showed up, or stowed when someone didn’t eat with the rest. 

“Hiya Janus! Kiddo!” Patton called from the kitchen. “How does grilled cheese and my famous soup sound?” 

“Sounds  _ horrible _ , my dear.” Janus drawled.

“TAKE THAT BACK YOU FIEND!” Roman jumped up, knocking Logan’s glasses askew. The man harrumphed before making his way to the table, sitting on Virgil’s free side.

Logan leveled a glare at Roman. “You, Roman, of all people, can understand the difference in inflection that comes with Janus lying.”   
  


“Yes… but-” He whined. 

“He was literally saying it sounds great, Princey.” Virgil groaned. “Don’t get your feathers ruffled over nothing.”

Roman gasped, putting a hand over his heart. “Did not!”

***

The meal passed uneventfully, with Deceit egging Roman on and Patton spouting puns whenever possible. Roman cleaned up the table. Janus went to the Subconscious to have a gossip-and-spa night with Remy and Emile. When Logan stood up from the table, Virgil did too.

“Can I- can I talk to you for a minute? In your room? If that’s not, if that’s ok.” Virge stammered.

Logan grabbed his book, taken aback by the sudden request. “Of course, Virgil. You’re always welcome in my quarters.”

The two men made their way to Logan’s room. The door swung open to reveal a two-tiered circular bedroom. A desk in the middle of the room was covered in maps, papers, and a computer. The second level loft had a soft queen-sized bed, the domed ceiling made of glass to see a perpetual night sky. Logan cleared a spot off on the desk, knowing Virgil liked to sit on odd surfaces when he’s anxious. Virge smiled at him gratefully. One man sat in a chair, the other cross-legged on the desk.

“What did you want to discuss?” Logan softly prompted once they were both comfortable. 

“The- the meds.” he rubbed the back of his neck, legs tucked tightly beneath him. “Thomas has them prescribed. I know that much. When do I- when will he start taking them?” 

Virgil’s knees trembled, the anxious side softly shaking. Logan took one of Virge’s hands in his own. “Everything will be all right, Virgil.” He said. “Thomas is due to start taking them on Monday. Approximately two days from now.”

His vision tunneling, Virgil folded over his legs.  _ Two days _ . Oh gods. He wanted to get everything over with, but that was so soon! Two days to worry, two days to panic. Moving his hands to cover his ears and screwing his eyes shut, Virgil could faintly hear Logan saying his name. 

Logan could keep him safe.   
  


***

This was the worst panic attack Logan had witnessed Virgil have in  _ years _ . He had  _ passed out _ , for Tesla’s sake! He struggled for a moment to move the taller man to the fainting couch he kept in the lower half of his room. Logan would’ve preferred to let Virgil use his bed, but he wasn’t strong enough to carry V that far. He covered the anxious figment with a blanket before sinking back into his chair, content to do some work. 

After a few hours of work, the logical side fell asleep as well. He curled up into his plush desk chair, facing Virgil.

“Goodnight, my star.”


	4. Crepes and conversation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *camera pans to me, sitting in a bedroom covered in various types of pillow and mattress stuffing. I throw a handful into the air.*  
> Fluff! Plus my fave dramatic sleepy gurl shows up!  
> Comments fuel me more than caffeine ever could, so any screeching about the chapter is appreciated!

Light filtered from the edges of the domed ceiling, giving the sky a sunrise coloring, but leaving the stars visible and bright. Virgil opened his eyes to the soft light. He panicked for a moment, forgetting where he was. When he remembered the afternoon prior, he groaned quietly and scrubbed at his face with a hand. The anxious side sat up, turning towards the door and catching a glimpse of someone in the desk chair. Virgil cautiously got up, moving towards the small figure before realizing it was-

“Logan?” He whispered.

The man in question sighed and repositioned himself slightly. Logan had managed to -somehow- curl into a ball on his chair, and was fast asleep. Virgil blushed and delicately removed the nerd’s glasses. He plucked the man from the seat, sweeping Logan into a bridal-style carry, and moving him the few feet to the couch. Logan didn’t wake up.  _ Gods, the guy sleeps like the dead. _ Virgil positioned himself behind Logan, pulling him close, and fell back asleep.

***

Logan awoke to warmth at his back and the soft arguing of the other sides seeping through the mindscape from the kitchen. As he lay in the haze of someone just coming out of sleep, he realized a few things. One, Virgil had gotten up at some time, saw him, and moved him to the couch. Two, Virgil was holding him. Three, this was objectively the best moment of his life. Virgil pressed a tired kiss to the back of Logan’s head. 

“G’morning Lo.” He murmured.

“Salutations.” Both men basked in the early morning glow, acknowledging the closeness sleep had brought them.

Virgil groaned, and Logan could feel it through his back pressed against the other. He blushed. “I don’t have to get up, do I?” The purple side complained.

“No!” Logan said a  _ bit _ hastily. “No. It is Saturday. It would not be remiss of us to stay here a while longer.”

“ _ Suuure. _ ” Virge drawled, pulling Logan closer. “G’back to bed, nerd.”

“Affirmative.”

***

Roman sauntered into a kitchen with a a skip in his step and a song on his lips. “A most wonderful morning to you, my dear!”

“And to you! I’m making crepes!” Patton chirped back. The two men worked in tandem, as per usual, to make coffee, set the table, and Roman helped out a bit with the cooking. They sang together while Roman prepped fruit for filling and Patton baked the crepes. As they sat down to eat, their conversation turned to something they’d all been avoiding.

“I don’t think Logan was wrong, but this isn’t a dragonwitch I can slay for Virgil.” Roman said, picking at his food. “I know this is not about me, but I feel quite useless!” He laughed at himself, now self conscious.

“Oh no, Roman! You aren't useless! I’m worried about my kiddo too, but he reached out to us for help! He made the steps to start the conversation, and I’m so proud of him. And I’m proud of you too!” Patton grabbed Roman’s hands, kissing him on the forehead. 

“I guess so.”

Three figures slipped into the kitchen; one sweatered therapist, one jacket-clad figment, and one deceitful side. Deceit, Remy, and Emile joined them for breakfast, each reassuring Pat and Princey, adding their two cents with a host of puns, ‘Gurl’s’ and sarcasm.

“Babydoll, he needed some help. Our Virge hates feeling  _ feelings _ , and you know the gurl has been venting to LoLo all night.” Remy sipped his latte, winking over his sunglasses at those gathered at the table.

“Virgil’s using the coping mechanisms he’s learned, and this was the next step in his growth!” Emile added. “The mind is a complicated fusion of wants and needs, and he’s doing better when it comes to articulating those self-made goals!”

Patton nodded. “Yeah! You’re right. I’m so proud of him!”

“Picani better be right.” Janus scoffed. “He’s the only one with a degree.”

Patton left a breakfast basket outside Logan’s door, and the sides had a soft day in. Cookies and movies, a spa day, and some needed conversation.

And all was well.


	5. Zuko vents to Appa and Emile

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Picani is genderfluid now because it could be gayer!!! I'm adding more gender rep in this fic because i'm going THROUGH it right now, so bear with me! Sorry for the late update, life's crazy right now for everyone. I split this chapter into two, because I looked up and Picani had stolen the stage for 500+ words :0  
> I love all you guys for commenting, and the kudos! Thank you!  
> If you see a typo, roast me in the comments so i'll fix it!

The morning of Monday came, and everything felt a bit different. Logan and Virgil met early in the kitchen, not surprised at all to see Remy scrolling insta, already awake. The sides slowly filtered into the kitchen. Each had their own routine, a song and dance between the seven -sometimes eight- of them. Emile and Patton chatted in the kitchen. Roman serenaded Remy and Virgil until they both roasted him enough to stop. Janus and Logan surveyed the scene with barely veiled mirth, discussing the merits of age-old philosophers. The facets of one Thomas Sanders discussed well into the morning, ignoring the way each of their hearts skipped when he took his morning medicine. The plan for today was for all sides to go to work, ending the evening with a movie night and cuddles. 

Of course, things never go fully to plan.

***

Halfway through the day, Virgil noticed something odd. His heart picked up in pace, but even the familiar tug of anxiety felt… different. V shoved his hands into his hoodie pockets and slunk into the subconscious to see Picani. He let himself into the space with a timid knock to Emile’s office door. The therapist had her own office and waiting room in the mindscape, reminiscent of a real-life establishment. However, Virgil was always encouraged to forgo the waiting room and walk straight (gay) through to see the kind enby.

The spectacled therapist looked up from her computer, gesturing to the plush couch. She was wearing her ‘she/her’ pronoun bracelet today, and her usual sweater-button up combo was paired with a soft grey pleated skirt. “What’s up, Doc?”

“I thought that was my line.” Virgil said with a huff, curling up on the sofa and hugging his knees. He appeared to think about something for a moment before looking up.  _ Oh, fuck it. What’s the harm?  _ “Can I have a comfort item?” He worried at his lip with his teeth.

“Of course kiddo!” Emile offered Virgil the basket, where the anxious man selected a cuddly Appa plush from the Avatar the Last Airbender series. “In an ATLA mood today, are we? Well, let’s start there!” The therapist leaned forward, smiling softly at Virgil. “What character do you most relate to right now?”

“Uhh… Zuko? I guess?”

“Why do you think you relate to our fiery guy today?” 

Virgil looked down at the Appa plush, thinking. “I think it’s because. Like, he didn’t think for himself? He kinda just followed the path everyone set for him. He didn’t have a choice, but he could’ve done something more?” He hugged the plush to his chest, running his fingers through the soft fur while bringing his knees down to sit cross-legged. “He did a lot of shitty things, but Aang still forgave him and he- he shouldn’t have.”   
  
Dr. Picani straightened, sadness flashing over her face before smoothing into a concerned expression. “Now kiddo, you’re jumping to conclusions now. Why shouldn’t Aang have forgiven Zuko?” Emile had a sneaking suspicion they weren’t talking about the character, and wanted to see if Virge could make the subconscious dive himself.

“Because… because Zuko did horrible things. He didn’t deserve to be forgiven, to- to be a part of the Gaang!” Virgil exclaimed. He looked up at Emile’s shocked expression and thought about what he just said. “I’m projecting again. I think… Pat and Princey and Lo are Aang… and I’m Zuko. I feel like this because- because I feel broken.”

Emile stifled a hurt noise in the back of her throat, struggling to separate the patient from her friend who was hurting in front of her. “And what brought on this feeling, you think?” She prompted.

Virgil buried his face into Appa’s fur. “Thomas started the meds today. I know that it’s going to take a while to kick in, and I’m not a failure for needing them, it’s just-”

“Internalized need to be normal?”

“Yes.”

“Even though normal is a lie and completely subjective?”

“...Yes.”

“Virgil, I want you to look at me.” When the anxious side had met the therapist’s eyes, she continued. “If you ask me, or anyone else here, we’d all say the same thing. You are perfect. You are loved. You deserve to live in a world where you don’t have to be anxious. You have an anxious brain, and it is beautiful.” They both had tears in their eyes when Virgil launched himself across the room to hug one of his best friends.

***

Logan, Patton, and Roman were in the living room when Virgil walked into Dr. Picani’s office. Lo was working on the script of the next video, Roman by his side, all three bouncing ideas and lines off each other. 

“That line does not  _ rhyme _ , Microsoft  _ nerd. _ ” Roman prodded Logan in the side.

“It’s one of Thomas’s lines, there’s no need for it to have a rhyme scheme.”

“You are no  _ fun _ !”

Patton giggled, introjecting quickly before the two could get out of hand. “Ladies, ladies! You’re both beautiful! I’m going to go make some lunch.” He waltzed out of the room, soft hips swaying with each step.

“I hate to see you leave babe, but boy do I love watching you go!” Roman called, getting up to follow Pat. 

***

Patton made a quick salad, stealing kisses from his wonderful boyfriend as he did so. “Did you see the way LoLo blushed? So cute!” Pat squealed.

“He was practically red! We really need to get that one and Panic! At The Everywhere together, they’re hopeless.” Roman agreed.

“Give it a few more chapters~” 

“What was that?”

“Oh nothing! Just talking to myself!”

The two sang a few Disney songs together before sitting down to a flirtatious lunch with just the two of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to leave comments of any kind, I love to see extra hearts for kudos, screeching about the chapter, or any ideas/theories you may have!


	6. Trust.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since last chapter was for last week... and this is for this week.... have part two!! Thank you all for the kudos and hits, I love y'all so much! As usual, roast me if you see a typo or grammar issue.   
> Without further ado. . .

After Virgil left Emile’s office, she rushed to see her boyfriend. Instead of greeting her like he normally did, he merely opened his arms for the therapist to fall into. As the pair sank to the floor, Remy murmured wordless comforts into her fluffy hair. She cried and explained the brief details of what had happened, how Virgil was hurting. “And- and I can’t help him! He has to- to work it out on his own!” She sobbed into his chest.

“You are helping him, doll. He came to you, like you asked for him to. He reached out.” Remy rubbed his datemate’s back. “And he worked his way to the root by himself. That’s progress, babe.”

“I… you’re right.” Emile looked up, wiping her eyes and straightening her glasses, smiling sadly up at him.

“Can you say that one more time?”

“Remy.”

“Maybe in writing?”

“Remy!”

Emile tackled the offending figure, who was laughing uncontrollably. She straddled him before peppering Remy’s face with kisses. He rested his hands on her waist, smiling up at her. “You’re better than strong espresso and the smell of lavender.” Remy murmured into her neck.

“Neither of those things go together, darling.”

“ _ Exactly. _ ”

***

Logan was in his room a few minutes later, having taken his lunch with him. He picked at his salad, oddly numb.  _ Why did that line impact me the way it did? _

“ _ Ladies, ladies! You’re both beautiful!” _

It’s not like Logan was unfamiliar with the intricacies of the gender spectrum, being privy to the wonderful resource that is Emile Picani. He had just never had any reason to question himself before. He wrapped his (her? their?) arms around his body, moving to the bed and laying in the fetal position. Questioning the very fabric of his identity is… terrifying, to say the least.  _ I need to talk with Dr. Picani again. _

All the sides used Emile’s services, as a friend and as a resource for any internal issues that come up. Roman when he got overconfident or felt useless, Patton when he fought unhealthy selflessness and toxic positivity. Hell, even Janus saw Dr. Picani regularly, despite the fact that no one knew what he saw her for. It was hard for Logan to reach out. He had unhealthy expectations for himself, and he knew that. 

He needed some sleep. He needed a hug.

***

Virgil and Janus ordered pizza for dinner, joining Pat and Princey in a Disney marathon. After the first movie, Patton glanced towards the bedroom hallway, face scrunched in concern. “Have any of you seen LoLo since lunch?” He queried, looking at the others.

Roman frowned. “No, I have not.”

“No, actually.” V said.

“I’ll check on him.” Dee stood. “It’s  _ not like  _ Logan overthinks  _ from time to time _ .”

“Give him a  _ pat-on _ the back for me, kiddo!”

Walking slowly from the mess of bickering that was the living room, Janus made his way to the observatory that served as Logan’s bedroom. He knocked three times on the door in quick succession. Upon hearing a weary “Enter.” he made his way through the room, up a small ladder tucked against the curve of the right wall, to sit on the edge of the bed. Logan was curled away from him, hugging a patchwork pillow to his chest. Janus felt his heart clench with something akin to lovesickness.

“Logan?” He murmured.

The logical facet sobbed before turning and holding out his arms like a child. Deceit quickly moved the pillow and layed down to hug Logan close. The smaller man clutched at him, wordlessly crying. Janus rubbed his back, allowing him this rare moment of emotional vulnerability. When the tears made way to small hiccups, he started whispering comforts to Logan.

“It’s okay. I am here. I will always be here.” Dee murmured. “Is there anything I can do to relieve you of any burden?”

“I don’t…” 

Janus tilted Logan’s chin, looking the man in the eyes, so much brighter without the glasses. “It’s okay. Tell me as much as you want, as little as you need. I will be here as long as I am welcomed.”

Logan buried his face into Dee’s neck, the snake-like side stiffening at the feel of skin on his sensitive scales before relaxing -despite the vulnerable position- onto the mattress. “I don't know who I am anymore.” He breathed.

Janus shivered. “That, my dear, is an exaggeration. You are a brilliant researcher. You are the best debater I've met. You're my… friend. You're friends with all of us, even Remus. Maybe even more with Virgil.” Logan giggled. Logan.  _ Giggled _ . “You are an astronomer. You love the stars.” Deceit ran a cautious hand up Logan's back. “This has nothing to do with your intellect or emotional intelligence. Does it.”

“No. But thank you. I- needed to hear that. I just… Patton said something and I couldn't figure out why I reacted the way I did and-” Logan rambled.

“The point, my dear?”

“Ah. Yes. I don't know whether or not I am cisgender.” 

“That is perfectly valid,” Dee said softly. “And there are people you can talk to about this, if you wish to discuss it with someone else.”

Logan looked up sharply. “I trust you, Janus.”

Deceit said nothing, only held Logan tighter.  _ Holding something close that can never be mine. How… _

_ Selfish. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments of all kinds give me seratonin, so feel free to screech about the chapter, add extra hearts for kudos, or give me your theories!


	7. A Few Questions and a Plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y'all! Marching band is just starting for me, so the upload schedule might change, I'll try to keep y'all updated on that! I've been working towards some major fluff and minor character dev, so I hope y'all enjoy the new chapter!

The days passed in a whirlwind, one week, then two. Virgil slowly felt the effects of the meds, allowing him to sleep more, be more effective in his job as a side. The others saw the tension leave his shoulders over time. He smiled more, laughed with ease. He was less jumpy. Virgil was… confident. Everyone was proud, and two sides fell even more in love with him than before. Logan was a bit more reclusive, working through issues of his own in silence, but even he was pulled to the bright smirk that was on V’s face more often than not. 

Virgil and Logan spent more time together, silently working on projects, or discussing arbitrary Tumblr timelines. Logan hadn’t told him yet. He had gone to see Dr. Picani, and had caught them at just the right time.

***

“Dr. Picani? Salutations.” The shorter man ran a hand through his dark curls, lilac bruises under his eyes.

“Hello Logan! Come on in!” They chirped. They were clad in a tan jumper with a ruffled collar, a sweater around their waist, perched on their swiveling desk chair. Their cream-colored pronoun pendant gleamed from their wrist. Logan hesitated before walking in stiffly. He sat on the proffered chair on the other side of Emile’s desk, forgoing the couch and beanbag chair. “What can I help you with on this fine day?”

“I have a few questions.”

“I have a few answers!” Emile laughed. “You don’t typically dance around the subject like this, are you ok?”

“I… I will be.” He adjusted his glasses. Folding his hands tightly in his lap, Logan continued. “How did you discover your gender identity?”

Picani brightened. “Oh! It took me a bit to realize everyone didn’t feel the same way I did, actually! I thought, ‘Well, everyone must feel like this,’ and when Thomas met Joan and Talyn, I realized there were other options for me. I tried out different styles, different labels, pronouns. I figured out pretty quickly that everything was a bit… ah. Stagnant, for me!” Emile flushed and smiled, looking into space a bit to Logan’s left. “Oh, I’m rambling. Does that make sense?”

“Yes. I mean, well- I…” Lo’s eyes widened. “What I mean to say is, it’s different for every individual as well, correct?”

“Bingo!” Dr. Picani quirked their head a bit to the side, analyzing the side in front of them. Logan looked desperate, in a way. Definitely in need of validation. “If this is more than a pursuit of knowledge for the sake of knowledge, you can let me know, Logan. I’m always here!”

Logan looked at his hands, fidgeting with the seam of his pants by his knee. “I- I don’t know.” He muttered. 

“What was that, Logan? I couldn’t quite hear you there.” Emile said gently.

“I don’t know. And I can’t  _ not _ know, I’m Logic. I- I have to be sound at all times, I have no choice.” Logan stated, eyes welling up with tears.

***

“Back you fiend!!” Roman laughed, parrying a flurry of swings, one hand behind his back. 

Janus and Ro sparred regularly to blow off steam, whether it be hand-to-hand or various weaponry. They both egged each other on, exchanging blows and banter in equal measure. Today, Dee had his gloved hands on twin hunting knives, and with Roman’s sword, each were fighting in a different style to allow both weapon sets to have accurate reach. They always sparred in the Imagination. That way, when they left, no wounds were permanent except bruises and soreness. It was a daily ritual to exercise together. 

When it came to Roman, everything was detailed to the point of obsession. The two fought in a circular clearing of hard-packed dirt. The trees around them were ancient redwoods, and if you knew where to look, you could see the glimmering ocean through the trees. The prince’s kingdom was lush and diverse. However, these woods were always quieter. If you knew Roman well, you would know that this is also where he came to find a semblance of peace.

“Never.” Janus drawled. Vary rarely did his voice ever show his exhaustion, and this was no exception. “Growing tired, my prince?” His lips split in a feral grin.

Deceit slipped underneath Roman’s guard, too close to use his sword. When the fanciful side stumbled back to create room, Janus crouched, sweeping out his leg in a low crescent. The kick caught Ro’s left ankle. He fell to the dirt with a crash. Dee was literally and figuratively on him in seconds. The deceitful side straddled Roman, trapping his arms by his sides and effectively making sure the other couldn’t flip him.

Roman groaned, throwing his head back. “Nope. Not at all.” He bit out.

“Lie!” Janus trilled, getting up and offering a hand to Roman. “You are bone tired, you stubborn mule. We are taking a break.”

Roman made offended Princey noises, opting to get up -and struggling to do so- without the help of his semi-scaled companion. “I! Am! A! Stallion, thank you muchly!” Roman exclaimed.

“... _ Sure _ .”

***

“Hold on there my diamond!” Emile’s face scrunched with concern. They looked down at Logan’s fidgeting fingers and the tears in his eyes, and decided to move this conversation to the couch. When they handed him a plush from the comfort object basket, Lo clutched it tightly, facing the cross-legged therapist. “You aren’t setting good boundaries for yourself there!”

“Wh- What do you mean?” The logical side sniffled.

The therapist tilted their head. It was worrisome that Logan couldn’t see the fallacies in his mindset, but they’d work on that later. “You’re putting unreasonable expectations on yourself. To hold yourself to so high of a standard, you’d have to be Hercules to achieve those expectations! You’ve made an Atlas of yourself, Logan.” Emile said softly. 

The side in question wiped the tears from his eyes from underneath his glasses. “So… as I am not a Greek hero or a Titan, the standards of which I am holding myself to are… illogical.” As he worked through the metaphor aloud, Logan calmed down and was able to think through what he had said. “How am I supposed to keep up with editing and research, and be able to figure out-” He trailed off with a huff.

Emile smiled, gesturing to Logan. “This?”

Seeing Dr. Picani’s grin, he sighed. “You just gestured to all of me.” He grumbled, finishing the quote. Emile bounced up and down on the couch with a squeal. 

“It’s difficult to balance life and identity, but I believe in you! You just need some grace-and-space!” Picani said. 

“Grace… and space?”

Dr. Picani put their hands in their lap, leaning forward with the same posture as a kid immersed in an exciting story. “Giving yourself the space to grow, and letting yourself do that growing! Giving your brain time to catch up to your emotions is a way to practice good ol’ g-and-c!”

“How would I do that?” Logan frowned. 

The two of them discussed and debated different tactics for Logan’s busy -by choice- schedule. They agreed upon daily journaling, setting up the logical side’s gender exploration in a kind of experiment. Logan would let the sides know that he was testing out new pronouns and labels, and he would journal how each change would make him feel. The shapeshifting the sides could do would come in handy. Along with the imagination and tailoring skills from Roman, Patton’s acceptance, and Virgil’s constant snark, Logan felt like nothing important to him would change. 

He was as he’d always been. A nerd. A friend. Something more, something complicated. Most importantly, he was logic. He was himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Questioning Lo Questioning Lo Questioning Lo Que-  
> Thank you all so much for all of your love, and I try to read all of your comments!  
> <3


	8. Man Killer Gown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the hiatus! everything got a bit hectic, and life got in the way. I have a tumblr! It's @disastrousatticus , feel free to send me asks there! Anyway, my chaotic ass coming in clutch with some fluff this week! Hope you like it!  
> also, 1k chapter? in this economy?

“So, let me know if I’m understanding what you mean,” Virgil leaned forward, elbows on knees and chin in hands. “You want to go by they/them for a while, to see how it feels. Then you’ll let us know if you want to change it?”

“Precisely.” Logan said, adjusting their glasses and nervously fiddling with their collar. 

The group had been talking for a few hours now, with Logan explaining their situation and the sides asking clarifying questions. They’d had this talk with Janus and with Rem already. It went well with both of them, Remy unphased and Janus surprisingly caring. Logan was wearing their usual polo-jeans combo, but there was no tie today. Instead, the shorter enby had on an old friendship bracelet Patton had made him.

Pat and Roman sat side by side on the long L-shaped sofa, Virgil perched on the back. Logan was on the loveseat, the living room rearranged so the sides could talk. V was hugging a pillow. The conversation had started awkwardly, but had quickly fallen into a familiar pattern. Logan loved all the sides so much. They were grateful that Emile had given them the push to talk with the others. It had dissolved all of their fears, leaving only the love they were used to.

“Well that sounds just dandy, kiddo!” The paternal side bounced up and down on the couch, holding hands with Roman. “We’d be happy to make the switch!”

Roman smiled up at Patton. “Agreed! It’s of no consequence to me, whatever makes you feel the most, well,  _ you _ !” He exclaimed.

Logan smiled at his friends around the room. Their eyes might’ve lingered a bit too long on Virgil, but that was their business anyway. “Thank you all for being understanding and open to the idea.”

“If we fuck up on anything, call us out.” Virgil said with a smirk. “I’d rather be called out than make you uncomfy, Lo.”

Logan nodded. “Of course.”

***

Virgil heard a light knock on his door that afternoon. He had been chilling in his room, sketching a few new costume designs for the twins. V was good at graphic design, so the two often used the anxious side as a sounding board for ideas and concept art. He had his windows open for once, allowing the sunny view of a meadow in the Imagination let some natural light into his plum-colored room. Virgil’s room was always in some state of disarray, but he had contained it to his desk for the most part. The anxious side looked up from his perch on the dresser to the door.

“Come on in.” He drawled.

Logan pushed open the door, shutting it behind them before walking over to perch on the unmade bed. The logical side had been working in their room all day. When they sat down, a measure of tension left Lo’s shoulders. “Hello, Virgil.” They said.

“What’s up?”

Logan fidgeted with their fingers. “I’m aware that you design the twins’ outfits from time to time, is this correct?” Lo asked.

“I do, but Ro usually takes creative liberties when it comes to actually making them. Why?” Virgil asked, head quirked to the side. 

“I was wondering if you would be opposed to- ah, I’m getting nowhere with this. Would you like to design a dress for me. If you aren’t busy, I mean-” They were cut off by an excited squeal from Virgil.

“Fucking of course!” He exclaimed. “What type were you thinking? Something more casual? Classy? I’d do an overdress design with a petticoat underneath, just for variety…” Virgil rambled, talking out loud. He flipped to a new sketchbook page while talking, starting to sketch a few forms. Logan looked on, dumbfounded. The anxious side was completely in his element. The medication was helping, all the sides could tell from a productivity standpoint. But this… Virgil was more himself than ever. Before, he was constantly worried, with panic attacks daily. Now, he was having fun. He still served his purpose as Thomas’ fight or flight and part of his self preservation. It warmed Logan’s heart to see his… friend, so happy. Virgil looked up from his sketches. “Oh.” He looked a little sheepish. “I was rambling, huh.” At their nod, he flushed a bright pink. V got up off the dresser, moving to sit cross-legged on the bed next to Lo.

Logan carefully took the sketchbook from Virgil, looking over the sketches he’d made. “Virge, these are…” All of the dresses had a space-y theme, modest in a distinctly  _ Logan _ way. The page was covered in little scribbled notes, pointing to different dresses and describing fabrics and the smaller details. “Perfect.” They looked up at Virgil’s hopeful expression, admiring his blush. “It’s perfect.” 

The two sides sat side by side, discussing the different styles and cuts. One dress had the perfect bodice, but they both agreed that other designs had better skirts, et cetera. This went on for hours, resulting in three dresses. One was a day-to-day style, with an illusion neckline and a flowing knee-length skirt that could pair with a petticoat for volume. The second was a more classy style for Princey’s ballroom dances in the Imagination. Queen Anne collar, floor length skirt, the whole nine yards. The last dress was what Virgil dubbed the “Man Killer Gown”. It was a strapless and backless number, with a thigh-high skirt slit. Every time either of the two talked about that design, they dissolved into laughter and soft blushes. 

“I’m leaving the fabric up to Princey. Him and Remus do a good job with that shit, I’m better at plausible design and fitting.” Virgil grinned at Logan. “I’ll talk to him a bit about the color scheme, but I’m pretty hands-off from there.”

Logan blushed, playing with the seam on the bottom of their shirt. “Thank you for helping, Virgil. You have a better eye for design than I do.”

Virgil closed his sketchbook. He moved it off the bed onto the floor, repositioning himself just the slightest bit closer to the smaller enby. “Couldn’t have done it without your help. You have the best idea of what you’d want, so it’s super nice to work through the process with you.”

Logan glanced at their watch and startled. “Oh! It’s nearly dinner time. We’ve been talking for a while!”

Virgil checked his phone, laughing at himself a bit. “Guess we got wrapped up in everything, huh.” He got up, extending a hand down to Lo. “Get some food with me?”

“I’d be delighted.”


	9. Romance and Lies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait! Marching band and summer depression kinda kicked my ass, ngl. Have some fluff!   
> You know the drill, roast me if you see any mistakes!!  
> I'm thinking of publishing an original work here, its a enby/l/m story about fae and ghosts! lmk if you are interested!!

Roman and Janus rose with the sun to spar. Ro never got ‘stage ready’ for their sessions in the clearing, opting to just roll out of bed and go. The deceitful side wasn’t allowed to comment on Roman’s hair, otherwise Princey would go back to sleep. This kept them both on track and productive during their sparring. It was a hand-to-hand day, and as they both sank down into their fighting stances, Roman opened his mouth.

“So, you and Logan, huh.” He smirked. Janus gaped at him, ears and cheeks flushing a remarkable shade of red. He sloppily blocked a few of Ro’s strikes before losing what little concentration he had and falling.

The snake-like side looked up at Roman dejectedly. “Is it… really that obvious?” He had tried to hide his feelings, and the very last person he expected to find out was Roman. The feelings he had for Logan were one sided. Janus knew that. He couldn’t help but wonder…

“No, it’s not, actually.” Roman’s smirk shifted to something softer. He sat next to Janus. “I am Thomas’s epicenter of romantic feelings. It’s only natural that I can tell these things.” He boasted. Dee rolled his eyes fondly. “I wouldn’t be too worried. Logan is… intelligent, but they can be very dense when it comes to emotions.”

Janus stood back up, a small smile softening his features. He offered a hand to Ro. “Don’t let them hear you say that. Or Patton, for that matter.” He said, laughing.

“Of course not! I would never!” Roman spluttered. “You’ll pay for that comment, fiend!”

“Oh? Make me.”

***

Patton popped his head into Emile’s office with a sneaky smile and a plan. “What’s up, Doc?” He chirped.

Emile looked up from his work, grinning back at the fatherly figure figment. “Hiya Patton! I thought that was my line!” The therapist gestured for Patton to come in.

“Actually, I was wondering if you and Remy would want to have a spa day with me?” He asked, eyes glittering with mischief. “I made chocolate-espresso cookies!”

“I can’t argue with that!” 

***

Remy sprawled across Emile’s lap, taking up the whole couch while the trio chatted. They had done each other’s nails, had tea and coffee respectively, and gossiped about the mindscape’s hopeless romantics. Remy had laughed and sassily denied his little stormcolud crushing on someone, joking with Emile about how Virge hates all things romantic.

“Yes, but Virgil has more time to work through his other feelings now! The anxiety and panic is more manageable, so maybe he’s focusing on love instead~” The therapist sing-songed, carding his hands through Remy’s curls. 

Remy huffed, closing his eyes. “Maybe. But my baby boy deserves the world and I hope Logan sees that eventually.” At Emile’s pointed glance and stilled hands, he continued. “I’m not going to terrorize poor LoLo, don’t worry babes.”

Patton grinned into his tea. “ _ Sure _ , Rems.” 

***

Dinner tonight was a basil pesto pasta, courtesy of Logan and Patton. The sides dug in, Janus and Roman taking lead in the conversation, telling the others of their adventures in the Imagination that day. Virgil had spent the day with Remus, fitting his new costume and making final adjustments to the design. Emile showed off Pat and Rem’s nails. Logan talked about his plans for the new episode, and caught roman up on the script changes he’d made. 

After the meal, the sides piled on to the couch for a movie marathon. ATLA was on the list, and it was Emile and Remy’s choice as the guests for tonight. They all cuddled together for the iconic opening and a long binge night. Logan practically sat in Virgil’s lap after Roman was done taking up the entire couch space.

They leaned in close, breathing the words into the anxious side’s ear. “I apologise for encroaching on your space, but it seems the prince has commandeered half the couch for his own pleasure.” Logan laughed quietly.

Virgil flushed a deep scarlet, thankful for the dim lighting. “That- that’s fine, Lo. I doubt we could move him if we tried, anyway.”

“True.” The smaller enby wrapped their arms around V’s torso, leaning their head against his shoulder. Throughout the show, Virgil glanced down at the small form curled against him.  _ It’s just because there isn’t any more space. Don’t read too far into this. _

Logan smiled to themself, snuggling in even further to Virgil’s tall body.  _ There’s room right next to him, I don’t have to be this close… but I want to be. _

**_I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else._ **


	10. update

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TL;DR sorry about the wait, life sucks

hey everyone! wow uh,, two months is a long while for a break. i'm super sorry that you guys have had to wait, i've been struggling with school starting and my anxiety going haywire. i am working on the next chapter, it's just not coming along as fast as i'd like. i have another og work i've been writing as well, and it's titled "ghosting." right here on Ao3! feel free to read that while i get the new chapter up. also i'd love to chat with you, my writing tumblr is @to-earthward . see you guys soon with a new chapter!

xoxo atticus (aka bananasarehellagay)


	11. Confessional

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the long awaited chapter is here! this story has been lagging for a while, so bear with me while i find my spark again!  
> as always, roast me if you see an error, all mistakes are mine alone!  
> feel free to comment anything you want <3 love your comments, they really keep me going!!

A timid knock sounded against Virgil’s door. At the side’s muffled ‘come in’, Janus slipped into the room. The snake-like side walked over to sit cross-legged on the unmade bed. He sighed, pulling off his gloves and tossing them in his hat, leaving the bowler on the bed next to him.

“Hello, Virgil.”

V frowned, slipping off the dresser to sit next to Janus. “What’s wrong, Jan?” Janus never took off his gloves in front of any of the other sides, barring the SvS redux video. Even without those clues, Deceit looked… tired. Years of living with the dark sides clued Virge in to the subtle signs that both Remus and Janus had. Not just tired, no, Janus looked exhausted.

“Logan loves you.” He said simply. Janus was hurting inside, but never would he withhold important clues from his raven. He loved Logan, and Virgil too, both in different ways. Dee looked up at him with a pained smile.

Virgil rocked back with surprise. “They- wh- WHAT?” A million scenarios flitted through his head. Every time Logan had come to him instead of the other sides. The small smiles and inside jokes. Sitting in mutual company while doing separate things. The late-night conversations over coffee when both should’ve been asleep. Huddling close together in the colder seasons because they both felt the chill more intensely than the other sides. “Okay, maybe that was more obvious than I’d like to admit.” Virgil sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck. “But why… why are you bringing this up now?”

Janus looked down at his hands, fiddling with the bedsheets. “Because… You aren’t the only side that c- that loves Logan. I also… harbor feelings for them.” He looked up at Virgil’s confused expression. “It wouldn’t be fair to you if I kept these feelings to myself when there is a very likely possibility that they will want to have a relationship with you. I am sure that they don’t feel the same way towards me. So.” Janus took a deep breath. “I thought you should know.”

“Janus…”

“I know I should bring this up to Logan as well, but I… I wanted to tell you first.” He muttered.

Virgil looked at Deceit. One of his oldest friends, his long-time confidant. He moved closer to Janus, startling the side, only to wrap him up in a hug. They both stayed there for a long while, allowing the reassurance of mutual company to take the place of words. Murmuring small comforts, the two formed a plan.

***

Logan was awoken by an insistent Remy, pulling them out of bed for, as the sassy side put it: “Stargazing, LoLo!” Of course, this was very unprofessional and was sure to mess up their sleep schedule. However, they had a feeling it was important. If only because Remy didn’t usually seek out one-on-one time with the logical facet, and it was the  _ middle of the fucking night _ . Logan packed a blanket for the two of them, and they made their way to the portal. Roman, at some point, had gotten tired of the sides waking him up from his ‘very princely and important beauty sleep’ and had made a direct line to the Imagination in the form of a vine covered door. Depending on the visitor’s intentions, the door opens to the different areas of the Prince’s realm. This includes, of course, said Prince’s line to the Dark Forest, and through it, the Duke’s realm. Since Remy and Logan only wanted to stargaze tonight, the portal showed them to Logan’s hill, his permanent telescope already perched on it’s zenith.

The two climbed the hill, spreading out the blanket and laying side-by-side. Logan shifted, lifting an arm to point out a few constellations. Orion, Casseopia, Taurus, and Scorpio. Remy traced the shapes, murmuring parts of the myths back to the logical facet. Logan smiled. “You brought me here for a reason, Remy. Why are we here?” They dared to ask. 

Remy sighed, tucking his hands under his head. “V likes you.” He said, quickly talking over Lo’s surprised squeak. “I just want you to know because my baby won’t stand up for his own complex feelings, and he’s hurting because of it.”

Logan shot upright, looking down at their hands. “That’s improbable. He… we are merely close platonically. That must be it.” They muttered to themself, curling in and getting quieter with each word. Remy’s brow furrowed. He sat up and took the hands of the logical facet into his own.

“Logan. You are safe, you are here with me.” When Lo’s honey-gold eyes met his own, he continued. “You are worthy of love, and you are capable of loving.” 

Logan sobbed, burying their head into Remy’s shoulder. Remy merely held them as they cried. Tears gave way to soft conversation between the two.

“But… I don’t even know how I would begin a relationship with him. Virgil is…” Logan sighed. “He’s wonderful. I don’t want to make a mistake that could cost our friendship. I think that would hurt more than any rejection.”

Remy looked into the sky, searching for some unknowable solace in the smatterings of stardust. “When I first started dating Emile, I felt like that. They’re such a hard worker, and my entire purpose is to set Thomas’s circadian rhythms. I laze about all day while they work. I felt… useless, and stagnant, despite the fact that I was doing my job to the best of my ability.” Remy rested his chin on Lo’s head. The two let the words settle, and collected their thoughts within the silence.

“You two are perfect for each other, despite that.” They murmured.

He hummed in agreement, remembering the early fumbling of his and Emile’s relationship. “It took work, as all things do. Can’t half-ass things that are important to you. I talked to them about it. How I felt, I mean. Emile was a doll, as they always are, and we reexamined what our schedules together would look like. They reassured me that I was doing amazing, despite the less-than-glittery feels.” He said. Logan pulled away, looking at their hands linked with Remy’s. The bracelets the two wore from Patton, Remy’s charm bracelet from Emile. Their short and healthy nails and his delicately manicured ones. 

“I think… I think I get it.”

Remy hummed in response. Lo went on. “You… compliment each other, and lend a proverbial hand when it’s needed. Taking the time to acknowledge your partner’s fears and grow closer because of it.” Their light eyes sparkled with hidden galaxies.

“I think I get it.”


	12. sorry :(

so i know this rlly sucks, but i have no motivation for this fic. i love this story, but the ideas for it are starting to feel forced and i hate writing like that. i wish i could tell you guys when i'll pick it up again, but i have no clue. so, as of right now, ihft is on permanent hiatus. feel free to scream ab my other fics or this one at my active tumblr @nblmpiningceo or my writing tumblr @to-earthward

sorry.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey y'all! This is my first Sanders Sides fic, so if you like it, shoot me a comment! It really helps me out, even if its just a heart showing you liked the writing! Love y'all!


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